I'll get to it...honest...but for now let's talk beer...

I'm sure some of you are wondering how my River Bank Run went, being it was going to be my longest official run ever and all.  I swear I'll get to it, but I'm still gathering some photographic evidence, deciding what I want to keep and trim off, wondering if you guys actually want to see a little blood in a post, and deciding how inappropriate I want to be.  The night before the race is mildly epic in its own right, so it may even get its own post. 

RBR post(s) "Under Construction"

As far as the run, I can say I've recovered from it, which is more than I can say about yesterday.  When I was told there would be a Founders tap takeover at Ashley's in Ann Arbor and a chance to complete what, for me, has been a 4 year mission of actually tasting the Kentucky Breakfast Stout (only eclipsed by the 6 year mission of Sam Adam Utopias, which I couldn't even get at the Boston Brewery itself, even telling them it was my honeymoon and a taste would be a nice late wedding present), it didn't take a lot of convincing from my friends to get me down there to hang with them last night.  Apparently we're still not too old for weeknight beer outings, as this was our second this month. 

The Ann Arbor odd couple ("El Jefe" and the "White Flash") got to Ashley's about an hour before us and fought the good fight to get us a table.  They were instructed that, under no circumstance, was the KBS keg allowed to go dry without them reserving me a glass of it.  The keg did go dry, and as my wife and I drove the last 20 minutes to Ann Arbor, she read to me the several texts with pictures of my beer and hilariously worded empty threats about them drinking it if I didn't show soon (e.g. "Hurry or mean ol' "El Jefe" is going to drink me!").

However, as I walked through the door, it was still there, still pretty cool, and well worth the drive.  Easily the best oak-aged stout I've had, and dangerously easy to drink.  With its 11.2% ABV, it's a good thing they were out.  They also saved me some of their Canadian Breakfast Stouts (10.6% ABV) to try, but I'm pretty sure that stuff was brewed by Buddy the Elf. 

Way too much maple taste, Eh

Before they even tapped the Founders Better Half (11.9% ABV), an oak-aged version of the Old Curmudgeon, I had put in an order for one, and "El Jefe" insisted I try the Left Hand Milk Stout Nitro (only 6% ABV this time).  Unfortunately, I got a bad pour of it, and after tasting himself, my friend reassured me that this was not a typical result for that beer (not good).  So, at least for now, the title in that category still belongs to Saugatuck's Neopolitan Milk Stout (which is actually dead tied in ratings with the Left Hand on BeerAdvocate).

After another Red's Rye PA (6.6%) we headed out to Dominick's so everyone could get sangrias in a jar.  I declined, which, after tasting my wife's sangria, I realized was a huge mistake on my part, and sat begrudgingly drinking my Bell's Two-Hearted Ale (7.0%) while we talked about our friend's recent wedding, our wedding before, and who may or may not be the next to go.  About 5 months back in Chicago, when talking to "El Jefe," my wife told him that, even being a rare fit like ourselves, there are people out there like him, and his lady is out there, even if she's very hard to find.  Only, with the alcohol from that night, her actual words might have been that his match was "like sasquatch, only cuter."  So that got referenced again last night, several times, when referring to people's potential existing counterparts....which usually led to many girlish giggles (only one of which was actually coming from a female).

"You mean like Quatchi?..."

We left there after about an hour to join our other friend ("Guidemaster") who drove down late, and we all grabbed a Centennial IPA (7.2%), and after that began a nice long sobering up process.  It was a very good thing we started this night early, and stopped early, otherwise we would have been sleeping on someone's floor and driving into work from Ann Arbor this morning.  

We walked around for a bit, and not having a Taco Bell within proximity, we did the next best thing and, probably much to the dismay of the crew @ epicportions.com, actually went to Tio's, spent money there, got the Mt. Nacheesmo, and split it 5 ways.  John and Jeremy, we're all sorry, but I still love your blog, and I know you're right about the place (except for the Chiles Rellenos with Spanish Three Cheese, though you can't ever go wrong stuffing a pepper with things, so maybe that doesn't count).  Sometimes you just want nachos that are slopped together, though.  I mean, we would have been willing to melt kraft singles on a plate of the Las Fortunitas chips you get at Costco, if it came to that.  That goes especially for me, because, outside of my morning Nature Valley bar, I hadn't eaten anything (yes, I know I should eat more regularly throughout the day).  At least I can explain where the good reviews for Tios that always used to piss you off  (I know you ended the verbal war against them a while ago) are coming from (drunks). 

I've got a longer run on the docket today, and then I'm going to give myself a little time off.  I have a nagging knee issue that needs a break before something happens.  It's not a bad weekend to take off of running anyway. My best friend is coming in from California this weekend and we're going to the Tigers game  Saturday.  It's also World Expo of Beer weekend in Frankenmuth, Mamma Mia! (don't hate on ABBA, I'll cut you!...) is in town, and there's always Comic Con in Novi if I really need something to do (and want to try to meet Billy Dee Williams and Yvonne Craig).  I'm sure I can stay busy without too much urge to run, expecially if today aggravates my knee again, but we'll see. 

Back By Popular Demand...

Let's face it kids, you all missed the fatty fat fatty, did you not?

As you all know, today is (part of) Fat Tuesdayweek.  I'm sure there's some of you out there trying to get in shape, or already superior physical specimens out there saying to yourselves today, "Oh dear lordy bee, I had me-self a half a paczki and I feel soo bay-ad."  Meanwhile in America's High Five State, a man is running the gauntlet of every bad food he can tap into for the week before the clock strikes midnight and Lent begins, and it's all over for him (and running season seems to truly begin). 

Sure, I've had a good start to the year, but Fat Tuesday is a tradition, so I'm sticking with it.  A few years ago, I started stretching it out to a week Tuesday-Tuesday, because trying to fit all my favorite horrible things into one day is impossible and digestively aggravating.  Let's see what's on the board...

February 14th/7th Annual FVD Holiday Extravaganza
This requires a back-story.  I'll try to be brief.  In 2006, I got tired of being depressed on Valentine's Day.  The 14th is dad's death anniversary (2003), so if I wasn't alone on that day, usually my sh*tty attitude would make it so, and after already doing it twice, I wasn't about to just let that cloud hang over my head for life.  I called up a couple single bros and left them voicemails basically saying, screw (we used a more vulgar word) the holiday for making single people feel like a group of society's defectives and making us cower in our homes, let's go out to the bar.  We went out to the loft, we owned that bar for that night (much like we owned any bar in those days), and thus began FVD and this idea that we were the "undisputed 'Kings' of this town." 

Now that we're old, and that title has passed, two things from that night still remain:  the pledge that we'd celebrate together on that day, single or not, and not bail on our friends and when we say goodbye, we count the number of us out on our hands in unison and throw those fingers up on the top of our heads as a crown.  I think initially it started off as a cynical anti-love thing for a few of us, but it's grown into more of an inclusive thing that everyone looks forward to.  My wife secretly still gets her flowers, and dinner, and she gets drinks of top of it.  We usually end up doing more with our friends that night than we'd ever do by ourselves.  I think it's become a really nice tradition, and, no, we're not out trying to ruin anything for you mushy couples...it's never been about that, even though you may look over and realize we're having more fun than you.  Also we've made matching T-Shirts since the 2nd one, which usually turns out to be either awesome or a total nightmare.  This is because we never plan a thing ahead ever, and get the whole thing, including the design, together after work.

2012 Logo

My Wife's FVD card to me. It pretty much ruled my universe, much like her.

Anyway, chalk me up for a huge burger at Ashley's in Ann Arbor (first time we took this show outside of Flint or Detroit).  They have half the world on tap so I had a St. Feuilliien/Green Flash Biere De L'Amitie , two Founders All Day IPAs, and a Primordial Porter.  Then I finished up my shoestring fries with my wasabi sauce.

Feb. 15th
Hello buy one get one BK Chicken sandwich...two original please...

Feb 16th
I forgot and I ate healthy...stupid, stupid, stupid

Feb 17th
BK chicken again, originals again.  Ate both slow enough to realize they now taste a little like ground cardboard.  Then some night time rice krispie treats made by yours truly.

Feb 18th
It was my last pre-Lent chance to test this Five Guys place.  I still have never been to one and there was one within striking distance of the beer run my wife and I were on.  So we stopped and each of us got a burger and split a fry and a diet Barq's.  Cajun fries are good, but nothing you can't make at home, and the burgers are good, but it's about the same as a Halo Burger only thinner and taller.

Cajun

After the Five Guys, we had our "Super Boris Funtime Party," watching Russian-themed movies while trying to purge the excess wedding vodka.  We managed to kill a bottle of Smirnoff, and drank a few Russian/Ukrainian beers that we realized had been expired for over a year but bought anyway.  The beer store must not move Russian beer too often.  I also realized I may have missed my calling as a bartender.

Small Carnage

Feb 19th
Sunday was Lucky's with my wife, brother, and sister for lunch.  So it was chicken parmesan, side of alfredo, and a lot of Dr. Peppers.

Then I picked up some Kroger Jammed Cookie Dough ice cream later that night.
Feb 20th
I finally had my first Taco Bell of the year.  24 total layers of burrito (two 7's, two beefy 5's)

Then, for dinner, it was time to raise the red roof...

My wife, her dad, and I destroyed a large onion and green pepper pizza, 22 wings, and a 5 piece breadstick.  Oh, and then a few hours later I knocked out a package of pizza rolls.

Fat Tuesday
After yesterday I couldn't even think about eating until maybe noon.  I've since made up some ground, and here comes the grand finale:

*Finalized Results*
2 Bavarian Creme Paczkis
1 16" Big John Steak and Cheese
A 5 mile run with Jason........wait, what the hell?  Didn't you just eat a lot of food?  Yes, but I am not human.
2 McDoubles
10 piece Chicken Nugget
2 pints of ale
48 oz of Coca-Cola
1 giant size Mallo Cup 4 pack
1 Raspberry Paczki
2 Tater Tots (yep just two)
A handful of gumballs
1 12 oz bottle Founders Dirty Bastard

...and that's it for the time being.  I will update if there's any more, but I feel semi-pregnant and there is no room at the food inn, so I figured I'd write you all and give you the food collapse that you all so missed.  Especially since this year I'm going to get very serious and snap back into gear tomorrow, when I magically turn into a very healthy, helpful, and contributing individual.  I also tend to enter what the Brewers called "Beast Mode" last year about this time.  First up on the hit list is probably the Corktown Race.  I will see you all on the other side.

Oh, and Friday we're going to bring home our Corgi puppy.  His name is "Renfield."

Renfield two weeks ago

Fuzzy Super Bowl XLVI Memories

After waking up incredibly early for 7am mass and running into my little brother there, with both of us wondering why the other was up so early on a Sunday morning, I made it back to my place to put some finishing touches on preparing the house for the big game.

The night before, with most of the work done, my wife and I marvelled at our house's cleanliness and wondered why we only get it this clean before we know people are coming to totally trash the joint.  I got home from church, and crawled back in bed with the girl and the kitten for a bit, until she got up for work.  Then I woke up, brewed some coffee and flipped on the stereo to shuffle some Velvet Underground, The Who, Hall & Oates, Steely Dan, and a few others while I finished dishes, sweeping, mopping, and vacuuming up the joint.

I moved the extra couch into the living room to provide the stadium seating, and just sat around enjoying the clean house and the music.  It was past 1pm, and I was going to flip the basketball game on as soon as anyone got there, but I was just enjoying the music, the coffee, and the clean house too much to part with it before I had to.  Nick finally showed, we cracked a few Molsons, and we turned it on, and it was pretty lopsided in MSU's favor.  Ken, his nephew, and brother-in-law showed up and brought the huge meat and cheese tray, and some hard ciders, and mike showed up with some more beer and dip.  The party was officially on.

I had Mike and Jeff help a friend of mine with his resume over a Sierra Nevada Ruthless (Rye IPA) and after that I just kind of popped into floating host mode, going around and talking to everyone.  I bounced around for a while, had a couple Founders Dirty Bastards, and then went back with Mike and Jeff and had a ceremonial run on the Arcadia Shipwreck Porter.  Then we jumped into the Atwater Vanilla Java Porter that I had loved and talked up so much.  Only this time, At-Water once again lived up to their name and it tasted like flavored watery crap.  I usually hate every beer they make, but this WAS good for the first two batches I had, and I'm hoping they haven't ruined it for good.  Only time will tell.  I made some guacamole, and bounced around a bit more, had some of Jen's enchilladas, made a store run with Jen and Jeff to get more enchillada materials, and came back with New England finishing up a long drive shortly before halftime.

The score was 10-9 at the time.  I was barely watching the game, and I couldn't really care less about Madonna and whoever those other people were, so I don't know if the halftime show was good or not.  Also, I can honestly say I don't remember a single commercial from last night either, and I don't think that all can be blamed on 6.6%, 8.5%, and 12.0% ABV beers.  I just wasn't engaged by the game, and it didn't seem like anyone else was either.  There was no cheering for TDs, no laughing at commercials, and not a lot of craziness going on at all. 

I think the majority wanted the Pats to win, but I think everyone figured the G-men would win, and whatever happened just brought out very little reaction across the board.  I spent more time in conversations than the game.  I would put my watch total for the thing at maybe 20­±5 minutes.  It was just more engaging for me to be talking to people, getting things for them, showing them where things are, and just trying to be Mr. Hostman than sitting in a chair watching a game I didn't care too much about.  I mean, did New Yorkers and New Englanders need any more reason to puff themselves up than they already do?  I didn't think so.  Either way, one of them was going to become even more intolerable. 

Most of the second half, I spent realizing that my head was a little fuzzy and I started rehydrating and getting some absorbent food in me.  Before I knew it, I'm looking at the clock, and just before 10:00pm, the whole thing's over.  This had to be one of the faster Super Bowls ever.  Also, my entire house was empty by 10:30pm.  Nobody lingered or spent the night, and the house wasn't even all that messy.  It was pretty incredible. 

I spent most of my lunch break trying to tally calories from my memory bank of the night instead of actually eating food (because I was still full), and I blasted way past that 2,500 average they quote for the average Super Bowl consumption by a person.  I'm looking at something more like 5,000-6,000 and probably over 2,500 just for the drinks.